im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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