What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
