Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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