Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
