we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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