You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
thus making me awesome and them whores
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
