Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
