your thong is hanging out like whoa
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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