you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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