hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
