we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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