He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
