I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
