So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
