he puts the penis in happiness.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
this will be a night to untag.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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