you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
