The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
