evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
