ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
