Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
