When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
