I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
