You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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