I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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