I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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