Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
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I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
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Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation