what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
