I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
