as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
50% drunk capacity currently
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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