Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
