there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
