I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
