i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess