is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
too bad you live with your parents still
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's blow job season.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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