tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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