I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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