i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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