dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You are the jesus of drinking
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize