piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I just cut my nipple shaving
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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