I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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