Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
