So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
