Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
