Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
