I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
