im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
