Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
