dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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