I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
