you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
why do cheetos always look like penises
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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