Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
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i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
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Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba