Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize